.:`` <3 hiim ``:.

`` starry starry nite [#] `-

Tuesday, April 10, 2007

regret ? There is no end to it . you can never find the beginning of the chain that brought us from there to here . should you regret the hole chain , the air in between or each link separately as you you could uncouple them ? do you regret the beginning which ended so badly or the ending itself ?

The past is always the most difficult thing to forget . as things comes back into your mind , you switch into a nostalgic mode . you find yourself regretting things you've done , things that you've not done , things that you've missed and things that missed you .

Its hard not to be yourself . its hard to endure the pain . its tiring to smile and be happy everyday when you're not at all . Its hard to say "i`m okay" when you know you'r weeping inside and tears are gonna fall outside . it's stupid to feel obliged when you'r not suppose to . stupid to feel guilty over something that's not your fault .

yet we've come to the root of all these . the root of regret . it stems from feelings , humanistic nature , love .

The bitterest tears shed over graves are words left unsaid and deeds left undone .
here i am , shedding over a grave where our relationship lies beneath .

Alright , enough of those . Went to put my phone in the locker when i stepped into the school . first thing i saw was the CB BITCH ! how unlucky can i be ? so was looking to see if he's around but yea , he wasn't . Went to class and as usual , did my homework while talking to Lee Ling and Per Li . The handsome ang moh prefect then came to chase us to the courtyard which is still so freaking early . zZzz . i shall forgive him since he's so handsome . LOL . went to the courtyard and was talking to Xiao Ting , Per Li and Lee Ling when suddenly , they said " there there there !" so turned around and saw Zhao Ming standing RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME !` then i jumped up . was so shocked . lols . Then talked to him and he purposely said " you got see until Louis ? "[refering to Xiao Ting] then i said " you very the purposely hors " so talked to him and argued with him about some things and he said to Per Li that i`m siao . lols . Saw the CB BITCH standing behind me so went to Zhao Ming there and whispered to him " Evonne the CB BITCH " then Zhao Ming went laughing away and said " got HER around very difficult to talk hors ?" so laughed and said "yes" before going back to my class there to settle down . was so unlucky can ?!` a fucking moth bloody land on my shoulder which totally FREAK THE HELL OUTTA ME !

Played Captain Ball then followed by Netball for P.E . the guys went to have their Napfa test , 5 stations . was hoping for the girls to be tested first but . . . . . next Friday then is the girl's turn . played with Noi Noi , Xiao Ting , Farwizah , Per Li , Lee Ling and Lih Lin . was having so much fun . then cause i raised my hand to catch the ball , Xiao Ting said that its like as though i`m doing a ballet dance then she went laughing and squating and the floor . so laughed with her and pushed her to the ground . bounced the ball and the ball bouced up and hit Xiao Ting's head . LOL !` After one hour of fun , it was BORING MATHS !` the GAY HAN was freaking GAY i swear ! the way he bend down to write at the bottom of the board and the way he cleaned the whiteboard is like a peacock . =x Recess time , idiot Yong Tau Hu kept hitting my head . I HATE PEOPLE TO TOUCH MY HAIR ! sat down directly opposite the drinks stall then saw this guy whereby i have been telling Xiao Ting and peeps that he's handsome . saw a person standing beside him looking familar[he was facing his back towards me] .When the person finished purchasing his drinks , he turned around and it was actually Zhao Ming . lols . he saw me so he went laughing and making those stupid actions . totally looked like a psyco . lols `~

the bell rang , so went to the courtyard to sit . Zhao Ming was sitting infront[he was supposed to be at the back] and he called me . so turned around and he kept calling me " chao ah lian " so i said quite loudly " no lors . you stupid ah beng ! " then realized people around me was looking at me so quickly cover my mouth . lols . kuku Zhao Ming kept calling me Chao Ah Lian then he even told his friend sitting beside him that i`m a Chao Ah Lian . ZZzZzz . Zhao Ming was so rude to the teacher . but it was funny . lols . walked past the table soccer so played with it even though my class was walking back to the class already . Xiao Ting then told me to look at Zhao Ming . turned and was him smacking the computer mouse cause it to have a " BONG BONG BONG " sound . so both Zhao Ming and i looked at each other and laughed . lols . Higher Mother Tongue was doing my own stuff . drew hearts and wrote his name on it . =]] realized that since that day i shouted SHUT UP at Kishen during Science lesson , many of them have been copying me whenever its Science lesson . did a test today and people kept saying Shut Up when somebody's talking . super irritating .

pair up with Alfien for English and kept laughing away with him . did Oral after that . heard quite a number of them presenting . then as it was 5 mintues more till dismissal , was hoping Miss Goh won't call me then suddenly Miss Goh said " Jolynn " so immediately , i went " HAR?!" and whole class went laughing . lols . went beside Per Li[as instucted] there to read then Per Li kept making me laughed . Then Miss Goh said " the article about tredegy you still can laugh" . lols . so controlled my laughter and was about to read when Matthaeuis said "CheeseBall !" [my frequently used word] Then immediately , burst out laughing . Then Johnathan copied him then i turned and said " shut up lah " then whole class went laughing again . kept laughing while reading then Matt kept interupting me which made me feel like slapping him . lols . then i wated to say " the son's death date" but ended up saying " the parents death note " LOL ! then immediately i said " HAR?!` what the hell i`m talking " then then whole class kept laughing and laughing and even Miss Goh gave a "HAR ?" look . lols . so read finished and whole class laughed again . so did i . Then the comment that Miss Goh gave was " apart from the lauging and giggling , voice is good . not bad . " LOL !`

Went out to the classroom and saw Zhao Ming at the stairs there . then he kept saying somthing which i cant hear clearly so i kept " HAR?!" and he said " Xia Lan " LOL ! kuku guy ! went to the locker to take back my phone and saw the CB BITCH again ! and guess what , SHE FUCKING APOLOGISED to me all of the sudden . something is really wrong in HER head . CRAZY BITCH !`

stupid Jia Wei ! he said he wants to tell him that i love him . !!!!!! what the hell ! it`ll be so embarrassing if he really did that ! arghhhhh !!!!!!`

- loving you more and more and each day goes by -

[x] i lovee y0u //*
6:40 PM

``y0u`r my 0ne and -- // * - 0nly -

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